Category:Carl Kolchak/Quotes

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[reading a letter to Miss Emily] Dear Miss Emily, the three dumbest things in the world are you, your column, and your paper. I am overwhelmed by the accumulated dumbness. PS Do you know of a cure for acne? A friend of mine has it.

--Carl Kolchak^src

[Voiceover intro] If by chance you happened to be in the Windy City between May 25 and May 29 of this year, you would have had good reason to be terrified. During this time Chicago was stalked by a horror so frightening, so fascinating, that it ranks with the great unsolved mysteries of all time. It's been the fictional subject of films, plays, even an opera. Now, here, are the true facts.

--Carl Kolchak^src

[Voiceover] Jane Plumm is fat. She talks a lot about water retention, big boned, but I have to believe the six or eight meals a day with snacks in-between to keep up her strength has a lot to do with it. And Plumm is a reporter however. We have mutual respect, mutual trust.

--Carl Kolchak^src

Jane Plumm: I don't trust you, Kolchak. You'd double-cross your own fairy godmother for a story.

--Jane Plumm^src

Carl Kolchak: Why Jane, how can you say a thing like that? Now, you know me better than that.

--Carl Kolchak^src

For once be a cop instead of an ostrich!

--Carl Kolchak^src

Jane Plumm: [Jane and Carl are ordering in a restaurant] I'll have a tongue sandwich, triple decker. Side of fries, macaroni salad, a root beer float, two scoops, and a piece of pecan pie.

--Jane Plumm^src

Carl Kolchak: Chili.

--Carl Kolchak^src